Cross

" god will not give you a burden you cannot Handle" 1 Cor 10:13:

yes he will not give me a burden so heavy that i cant bear,

and to think about it

it because of his Grace and Love .

I've been surviving this long.

no matter what the challenges and obstacle are

I've always manage to find a way in dealing with it.

but this time is different..very different, very very different...

as time pass lots of things change, we move on in life and our priority change,

as priority changes, new obstacle comes into life, new responsibility, new way of looking at things

and the cross becomes heavier and heavier every time, and the only way to carry it is by having great Faith

and a strong prayer life. and i have been slacking in that part lately.

and the stress is getting to me as well.

Career, Family, Friends, Finance, and Church, need i say more ? (thank god no GF)

i just hope its not too heavy for me to bear all these challenges.

One of the greatest challenge is;

When you know you can change things but You have no one to give you that support.

when you don't know who to relay on.

when everything is just so confusing.

when you need to undo mistake that has been made.

when you need to rebuild what was lost or forgotten.

and when you feel that you are alone all the time.

although i know he will guide me through all these, but i just cant help it, after all i'm made of flesh.

for now everything is bearable but for how long can i last.

lately i have been relying too much on my own strength to do it and i can honestly say is running dry very soon.

i need to get back up on my feet and start praying and only by depending on god's strength i can survive.

easier said then done.. haha....

OH FATHER I JUST HOPE, BY YOU PLACING ME IN THIS SITUATION MEANS THAT YOU HAVE A PLAN FOR ME TO OVERCOME IT, BECAUSE I AM REALLY REALLY RUNNING D

RY ON STRENGTH AND SOON MY RESERVE WILL BE GONE TOO, I HOPE ITS NOT TO LATE BY THEN. I KNOW YOU HAVE YOUR TIMING FOR EVERYTHING. I HOPE IT WILL BE SOON, THERE ARE LOTS MORE THINGS TO DO DONE AND TO BE IMPLEMENTED AND LOTS OF CHANGES NEED TO BE MADE IN ORDER TO CONTINUE THE PROGRAM.

- StarFish-

Happy New Year

Good bye 2010

and Welcome 2011

its has been great fun and stress throughout the entire year

from Being Committed in SIC Youth Rally 2010 Core Team

Getting a Job in Deloitte

Getting Drunk and also getting into trouble a few times

Getting a whole new prospective of looking at things

and the list continue

but the greatest give was being able to see and understand things in a whole new manner

there are lots of things i see happening but there are lots of people ignoring it

and i come to wonder sometime how small we are in this huge world

being in this huge world, lots of small, unwanted things have always being ignore

despite that, there a few who would cherish these small and unwanted things and called them gold.

I talk to a girl in one of the camps i went to lately, after listening and all the crying on how badly hurt she is and how suicidal she can be when she is emotionally compromise, i felt that there are more a person can do in order to make a difference. there are so much more a person can do.

what a faithful meeting that was. i just how she is doing alright now.

a quote from Mother Theresa " every good things you do in the world is like a drop of water in the vast ocean but that drop of water will be lose forever if you didn't do that good deed"

bring able to see these small and unwanted things and understanding that quote make me realize i have a different calling

sometimes I wonder, even of we known each other for donkeys years but can i call you a friend ? or are you just a drifter ( a person who comes and goes) ?

sometimes i wonder how well do you know me after those donkeys years we have spent together being friend ?

its a question i dare not answer...for i know the answer will have serious consequence or not

oh well that's life RIGHT!!!!

things are starting to change, i just hope its for the better

oh god i place everything in your hands

i am like pen but your the author who use the pen and write the story

-StarFish-

Knowledge is power guard it well

Pink Elephant Theory

will star talking about the pink elephant

pink elephant is some thing that is so obvious right in front of our eyes but we tend to ignore it because we are not comfortable talking about about it .

lesson learned

will talk about the pink elephant from now on .

-starfish-

What a day

reach office at 8am...

work...

9am.. the director came out... and asked

Director : Patrick you sick ar ?

Patrick : not really, just got a bit of cough

Director : oh, i tell you what , please go home now , please go get a MC and go home and rest , i dont mind you doing work at home.. now go HOME.

Patrick : er......ok .......

hahaha what a day

-starfish-

this really sucks

too many(as in A WHOLE LOT) things falling into the wrong place at the wrong time

sigh

Lord, why ?

why now ? of all the time in the world

WHy now ?

why all the challenges all comes at once

sigh ..

anyway

i went to church after work, attended mass and I meet up with an old friend today, Gregory(going to be a priest sooooon) for dinner . It was fun talking to him lah, and learnt a few thing about the bible from him as well. its so awesome.. haha

i found out that there are so much more we can learn from the bible rather than reading and understanding the bible verse. its so cool . will have another session with him before he leave for Kia su Land again.

oh i saw uncle Lawrence in church as well ,

he told me this, "Patrick you are really meant to cushion others, and you will do great thing and god has a plan for all of us ''

great word of inspiration ...

then i told him " then who is going to cushion Me when i fall "

he answered " god"

hahahaha seriously I believe he will, but the 10Million Dollar question is, how far will i fall until I hit the cushion.

well this is what i learnt from all the years of serving, dont ever try to understand god, seriously dont ever try, you will never be able to understand him.

all we can do is to pray and have faith, and believe. For he will answer our prayer in his time and not ours...

- Starfish-

Hope, Faith & Love

1Cor 13

and I'm Sorry

another trip to the hospital

hahah the pain is lesser now, thank god for that..

today when i wake up i felt a little cold..thought i was nothing therefore just leave it be...

after 1 hour i feel my whole body burning up...

nicely lah i took 2 panadol...things got better after that...

after a few hour, i started heating up again...so no choice lah..called mom..

then she sent me to the hospital....

waited, waited, waited.....and waited for the doctor

he went upstairs to see another patience's

after a while , i heard my name...nicely got up and went and see him..

told him the story..he said it may be cause by infection..he need to look at the stitching...

went to another room...lay down..the nurse remove my waterproof bandage...

and then he was like....IT LOOKS ok mah...

so i told him, the painkiller he game me is totally useless...no effect at all...then my mom say she also had try that brand but it has no effect on her as well, then Doctor say, it has nothing to do with me it genetic..you got it from your mom .......

took my meds, went home, once i reach home, the fever started again.......sigh.....

what a day...

-starfish-


and i was like ...............speechless.......

exploding sensation

work 3 day take leave for 7days... all just to recover from my minor operation to remove my exploding Appendic.. sigh.....

right now i'm at home recovering, seriously it hurts like hell ....

i seriously dont know how am i going to get some sleep later....

dam it hurts ..... :(


-StarFish-